When a child goes through sexual and physical abuse they lose all hope, their self esteem and their childhood. It sometimes takes a very longtime for them to feel safe and respect themselves. Many times with support from family and friends and the right medical treatment they can overcome the fear and hopelessness and have a very beautiful bright and prosperous future.. But in the other hand some children will have a harder time and it can take a very long time for them to feel safe again. Like my little girl Ciarra, you all have read and know everything that my children had to endure. The details and the extreme and brutality of the abuse Ariel Rodriguez put my daughter through was more than a mother can bare. Recently my little girl tried to end her life twice and pretty much destroyed everything in her room. Ciarra is not only dealing with the fact that she is Mentally challenged, suffers from seizures and is in special education she is not allowed to participate in any sports that she likes or to even spend the night at a friends house. She will never be able to drive or live on her own. But what makes it more traumatizing for Ciarra is the fact that the one person who was supposed to protect, love, and care for her was her abuser, and also he is free to live his life. To my little girl this is very disturbing and she has never been able to cope and accept it. Till this day those horrible memories and nightmares are fresh for her like yesterday and some days she will be a happy little girl but other days she blames herself, feels hopelessness and can't understand why, why he hurt her and why he didn't pay the consequences for his actions, she may not understand much but this she understands. Ciarra stated recently again to several counselor and doctors at the hospital in vivid details what her father did to her. I know what he did but I couldn't stay in the room like I said no matter how long the permanent damage he did to her is more than a mother can bare. My daughter is again in a hospital where she can get the help she needs and I do have faith and hope that one day some day she will feel safe and happy again. It is why is very important especially for Ciarra that I continue to fight for justice and help other families and children who have been abused.
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