- Posted September 20, 2013 by
INNERview: God is Teaching Me Through My Son
YVONNE PIERRE: Melody, could you take a moment to introduce yourself to the HYH readers?
MELODY BOGAN: My name is Melody Bogan and share my life with my loving husband, Carl, and our 3 ‘crumb snatchers’, Carl “Allan” (5), Vivian (3), and Samantha (21 mo). We are a family devoted to Christ in our faith and both work outside the home. After having my son born with Ds, life led me into a different path that I love. I am employed with a company that helps to take the confusion out of healthcare for our consumers. Walking this road with Ds there is so much information to digest and health insurance has been a hostile sea to navigate.
YVONNE: When and how did you learn Allan had Down syndrome?
MELODY: Allan was born at 37 wks, 1 day gestation. I’d had a threatened miscarriage in my 10th week of pregnancy. All of my diagnostic blood work and ultrasounds did not detect anything that would be indicative of Ds. At his birth he presented with hypoglycemia (extremely low blood sugar) and some respiratory distress and was taken to the NICU. While in the NICU, a resident noticed phenotypic features reminiscent of Ds. To this day I am not happy with the way the doctors handled themselves in presenting the news to us. I recall the attending physician saying to us “By the way, did anyone speak to you concerning the genetic testing we sent off?” I was floored after he and a resident kept insisting we were told shortly after his birth. This was not true and the fact they maintained that stance was disconcerting. Also, we felt simply overwhelmed as to us they were talking about a ‘condition’ and all we wanted was to enjoy our son. He was our flesh and blood and not the latest science study.
YVONNE: How much did you know about Down syndrome prior to his birth?
MELODY: Perhaps a great deal of my disdain stems from the fact that I graduated with my Masters of Science in the Animal/Biological Sciences, with an emphasis in Reproductive Biology. I knew quite well about genetics and Down syndrome, so to be talked to as if I were ‘ignorant’ was intolerable. After realizing my background and education, the doctors changed their tune with me and my husband immediately. Of course upon having his karotype confirm the diagnosis, I dove into as much information I could gather. Something about taking ownership and seeking understanding helped us get a better footing with our journey forward.
YVONNE: What was your initial reaction and how have it changed?
MELODY: Our initial reaction was naturally shock, but what was undeniable was our pure love for Allan. I’d give anything to have a better birth experience to simply hold him and not have the fuss and all the scientific talks about his condition. We cried a lot and grieved the life he would have as a typical needs boy. We too were scared, but relied heavily, as we still do, on our faith and our God. We realized this was bigger than us and He chose Allan for us. I was in love with him from the start. Looking back, I am starting to see how much Allan has saved my life from mediocrity. I live, walk, breathe in purpose. I’m working in a profession to help people navigate through confusing insurance matters. Allan has brought joy to our home that cannot be squelched. He is loving, kind, generous and a complete ham.
Read this INNERview in it's entirety at http://hyhonline.wordpress.com/2012/10/11/god-is-teaching-me-through-my-son