- Posted October 8, 2013 by
This iReport is part of an assignment:
Shutdown over: What next?
Furlough – Day 7 – Sick & Tired….. Tire & Sick
As the talking heads talked, not to each other mind you, but to the vast space of air above them, I wondered if they had somehow eaten breakfast cereal with fermented berries. As an example:
Senator X says: “I want to help vets, put them back to work, yada yada yada”.
Voice from off screens says: “Mr. Senator will you permit a question?”
Senator X, finally taking a breath says: “Yes I will permit a question”.
Senator Y asks: “Senator X if you are so strongly in support of veterans, getting them back to work, why would you not vote for the bill we put forward that did just that”.
Senator X responds: “Senator Y that is a very good question for I in fact do support putting vets back to work. You see Senator Y I believe that we as a government have a duty to help the American people. I believe we need to protect them from future debts, etc. etc. etc. (more pontificating, passing gas, etc. etc. etc.) …….. Thus Senator Y we have bills right now, today, that can help us support our country’s veterans”.
Senator Y (now somewhat comatose) responds: “But Senator X none of those bills will put many veterans back to work who are federal employees. Those bills will only put a handful back to work”.
Senator X responds: “You see Senator Y that is the problem we are facing as a country. That is a narrow review of the situation. I am offering you opportunities to support veterans. I have even offered to put the Veterans Affairs back to work with my bill……
At this point, starting to twitch uncontrollably I shut off the television. I was sick of it. I was tired of the endless insanity of elected officials who seem more interested in hearing themselves than solving problems. Furthermore, as the realization that our tax payer dollars pay for each of their $100,000 plus salaries (we’re talking millions here) I started to feel nauseous.
It was at the point of seizure and retching that two immensely pleasurable scenarios flashed through my mind and put me a smile on my face:
Pleasurable Scenario 1: An extremely angry and offensive football coach runs into the House or Senate floor (we could do both back to back), and starts grabbing elected officials and forcing them to run drills until they can no longer walk straight. At that point the coach forces everyone into a huddle, gives them 30 seconds to fix this awful mess, they all yell break, and I go back to work tomorrow.
Pleasurable Scenario 2: C-Span creates C-Span X, which is a channel where we get to watch House/Senate coverage Mystery Theater 3000 style. Wouldn’t it be beautiful? Heckling, silly comments, laughing, finger pointing, etc. May not get me back to work, but would be a worthwhile distraction.
As these two things are as equally likely as me going back to work by Friday, I will simply have to sit back and hope that somewhere, up in the stratosphere of speeches and gobbly gook, two passing ideas will careen into each other resulting in a solution. That or C-Span steals my idea ;).