- Posted November 30, 2013 by
Poughkeepsie, New York
This iReport is part of an assignment:
CNN Fit Nation: 2014 Triathlon Challenge
Starting over at 40; I need help.
My life starts in an unloved family, unwanted, and abused by the mother who was supposed to love me, and my dad died when I was 4. We were poor, grew up on welfare. I was not taught the basic things, which I needed to succeed. I was told that I was stupid, worthless, etc. My school life was not better. Anyway, I left home when I was 17.
My senior year was better, because I had a good friend with whom I hung out. Also, I attended a christian school, which allowed me to focus on making up for my educational deficits, so that I was able to graduate on time. My best friend's dad was the pastor, and he helped me get into college. This is why I was able to start college, and complete 52 credits in technical college. However, after awhile, the church eventually presented un-biblical teachings aka it became a cult. They continued to assert the I was a worthless human being, and unable to function in society without the direction of the church and their leaders in order to convince me to stay. While, it took me a few years, I finally left.
I have worked many jobs, unable to believe in myself enough to go back to college.
However, in 2002, my son was born, and because of him, I went back to college in 2005. I completed my bachelor's degree with a high GPA (undergrad classes) in 2008.
However, I was unable to obtain better employment, so between the stress of my angry soon to be ex-wife, my job, and the fact that I was not able to gain full time employment in a field more conducive to my education, I ate. I now weigh 350 pounds, which is more than 100 pounds more than I should weigh.
Now, I have a supportive girlfriend who is helping me believe in myself, and a son who needs me. Due to this, I have made a lot of progress in my personal life. However, I am still unable to succeed in attaining my weight loss and fitness goals. I read, try to diet, buy videos, etc. While I keep failing, I keep trying, so there is still hope. :) However, I need help motivating myself, learning how to become fit again, and to quit procrastinating and making excuses.
I just turned 40 last week, and I need to get into shape, because once I do become fit again, I can become a Probation Officer, preferably Juvenile, or even a Police Officer. While I am now too old to pursue these dreams in the state of New York, Connecticut does not have these age restrictions. My life goal is to help those who made the wrong decision, and help at least some of them become better citizens.
Lastly, I apologize if I am rambling, but I need help. I have ADHD, and I have struggled to complete this application. At least this year, unlike last year, I have completed it, even if it is on the last day.
Please help me, Dr. Sanjay Gupta, you are my only hope.
John W. Christopherson