- Posted December 16, 2013 by
South Mountain, Ontario
This iReport is part of an assignment:
My income makes me feel …
That wasn't the case at the start of this year, or even the past 15 years that I've been working.
Scared. Fearful. Stressed.
All of these were common emotions as I struggled to makes sense of why, even with a six figure income that I'd busted my behind to earn I was so worried about the bottom dropping out at any time.
As an entrepreneur, my fear was running my business. I was holding on to clients that should have been left behind years ago. I was losing my edge due to worry that I’d tick off a client and they’d pull a lucrative contract.
Following a two-week Spring vacation with my husband that most people can only dream of, I returned to my life and work with the conviction that something had to change. I knew in my heart that at the core of everything were some deep-rooted money issues.
Before you dismiss me as a poor little rich girl, I didn’t always have money in the bank or any financial security. I put myself school on student loans and paid off every cent. I was the poster child for poor student at a small college that is a playground for the to the rich and overprivileged.
Once in the working world, I started my career at the very bottom, working my way up the ladder quickly by outworking and outperforming everyone. My motivation was to never have to beg a friend to pay my massive heating bill or have to ask for financial help from anyone ever again.
Flash forward, 15 years later, I finally realized I still carried that experience with me. It made me scared at every turn. I knew the struggle and the hustle, and I just didn’t want that for my family after working so damn hard.
That realization set me free. After years of thinking about it, I finally made a massive change in the direction of my business moving to work with entrepreneurs and small businesses, but I did it without fear. I now wake up happy and ready to get to work.
Most importantly, I’ve learned to be proud of my income. No more fear. No more apologizing for my success. My income makes me feel proud, period.