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    Posted December 26, 2013 by
    Annandale, Virginia
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    The Bonding Capacity Of Humans

    As Christmas is now past, and the new year is just about upon us, here are a few thoughts for a peaceful 2014. For those that love science, and who also enjoy the art and science of love, perhaps this is for you.

    The Bonding Capacity of Humans

    Intimacy and Love are qualitative forms of expression that have some interesting similarities to the bonding of adhesives. This may not be the most romantic way of discussing this topic, but as I have been in construction for 19 years now, I can't help but notice the patterns.

    When we don't like something, but cannot get rid of it, we often say we are "stuck with it," but if we want to stay with someone, the closeness that is represented by that statement also has a bond associated with it.

    If you have ever tried to apply tape to a dirty surface, you know that the dirt sticks to the tape, and the tape becomes useless. If you don't know how to prepare the surface for adhesion, you are wasting time, energy, and money.

    In order for two people to "stick together," both people need to be "bondable." We have to want someone to be attached to us, and they must want someone attached to them. This is not a law that must be submitted to, but simply a process that needs to be understood.

    Our "bond-ability" can change over time, and is most often heavily influenced by how we interact with each other. It's not just a one-time event that defines our attachment to each other, nor can it be defined or maintained by a legal contract or any other means of authority.

    On the contrary, the bonding capacity of humans is an ongoing, dynamic and iterative process where the results of prior interactions feed back into the bonding equations of the future, as they have a direct impact on how we allow others to stick to us and how much we want to stick to others.

    May we all find ways to stick to each other this year rather than feeling stuck with something or someone we cannot escape.

    With love,

    Adam J. Read
    Construction Superintendent

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