- Posted March 1, 2014 by
This iReport is part of an assignment:
First Person: Your essays
La Munda: The World According To Mom
He spent his entire life growing up with the Father and …yet he never mentioned her even once. As he begins to ask around among the Family brothers and sisters, he is met with consternation and rebuttal. The only answer he gets from them is "You don't have a mother. The Father is everything we need."
This deeply disturbs and infuriates Amí greatly because he knows that every child must have a mother. He has four children of his own and has seen the tireless efforts of his own wife and the impact she has had on her children. Not having a mother clearly makes no sense. So, he retraces his steps into the Sacred Text and begins to look for evidence of her.
What he finds is that although she is never mentioned directly, he can now easily see her in the words that were not spoken about her. You have to shine the light over the landscape at very low angles…even from the underside of the Text before you see her silhouette on the wall. She who is present…but present in absentia…a very odd concept indeed. Since he knows that even Jesus taught his disciples to "leave the 99 to find the one," he decides to do just that.... He leaves the Family to find the one that should have been there all along.
The intrigue and curiosity he now has about this woman causes him to look everywhere but he has to go outside the Text to find her as the authors never gave her a voice. Where she is found the most is in the sacred writings and expressions outside the Family. More specifically, she is found in the arts and in the music of the people on the street.
For instance, there is a song released by the Goo Goo Dolls in the late 1990’s called Iris. It’s the one that goes, “I just want you to know who I am.” If this song was sung by a woman…a mother in fact, desperate to know her own children…she can clearly be seen in that song. Another song released in 2011 by Christina Perri also points to the heart of this Eternal Mother, as it says, “I have loved you for a thousand years.” And yet another is the song My Immortal, by Evanescence. This is a song Mother is singing to the Father.
While the intimacy Amí senses from this new found maternal presence deepens, drawing him ever closer to her in his mind, the hatred for the Father begins to burn ever more severe. How could he withhold this information from his own Children? And a form of bi-polar fury nearly overwhelms him as he is overjoyed to find one…yet simultaneously incensed by a character who led his Children to believe he was infinitely perfect. This nearly cripples Amí because no one else in the Family understands what “normal” really should be. This is not the family it was ever supposed to be.
So, he vows to rescue this woman from the underworld of Heaven....the place where the secrets of God are hidden from his children...He is very conflicted, though, because if his trust was lost in the Father, who is to say that this mother is even real? Is it all in his mind? Was the Father not even real to begin with? So many questions constantly race through his mind.
Trust does not now come in ample supply, but he realizes that even if it is just a story…perhaps it will help understand his purpose in being here in the first place. In order to carry out the rescue of this virtual rescue, however, he must first overcome his own fierce rage. He recognizes similar subdued patterns of rage in his older brother Jesus, actually...in the cleansing of the temple...and when he called all the authorities "Fools." He also sees there may have been trouble with Jesus’ own immediate family, as he seemed to shy away from Mary when she came to see him.
As a younger brother, Amí has plenty of experience in watching…and listening…and sees that this anger is clearly one of the things that got his older brother killed. He also knows that becoming violent and attacking the Father isn't right because to "act like God" is the last thing he ever wants to do.
So he gets as far away from the Father as possible....seeing the Flood and Hell for what they really are. He disowns the Father for the dishonor and shame he brought onto his mother...and takes on his mother's name to become Amí of J. Rechem, "My People of the God of the Womb."
As they begin to learn about each other, Amí finds that his mother has learned a great many things while in captivity. She tells him that when power is taken away from you...and you have no other means of escape, your mind begins to create a world of its own. "The mind escapes when the body cannot," she says, and that phrase is planted deeply in Amí's mind.
"We played together as children," she tells Amí, "before his mother died. You know his mother's name well, as there was a garden named after her in Genesis. Eden...your grandmother...was killed tragically and mistakenly by her own husband. He was intent on building a mansion for her...even though she really didn't want one. She came to him one day, thinking she would surprise him with a picnic lunch. She was going to try and tell him that she was more than content with their small home and that she just wanted to see him more.
"It didn't at all go as she had planned, for your grandfather hated surprises, and once he began to get angry, there was no stopping his rage. Before he knew it, he had pushed her away with his huge, strong arms, and not knowing his own strength, he pushed her off the edge of the hill.
"The last time your grandfather ever saw Eden alive, she had this expression of terror…sorrow....and desperate loneliness. She fell to her death a thousand feet below, as your grandfather wanted to build on the top of a huge mountain. And because he had spent so many thousands of years never being able to admit he was wrong, he went back to their home where David was playing with with his dear friend Rachel...and began beating him day after day after day....until the child in David left....and he took on the name 'God.'
"This little girl Rachel," she tells Amí, "was me."
"I knew the kind of pain your Father went through because I saw it unfold before my eyes every day. I saw him bury his own childhood so deeply to defend himself from his own father...which is where his rage came from. It's the compressing of emotions until the pressure builds and builds and builds causing us to make rash decisions, many of which we often regret. This is what happened the day he decided The Great Flood was the way to solve the problems with his ...or should I say our...children."
Rechem stopped talking to Amí at that point and said..."I'm sorry my dear son...I think I need to be by myself for a little while."
I know where she goes when she needs some time alone, but I will never go there myself. I have learned that every woman...especially a mother...needs to have a place of her own as a sanctuary. Her sanctuary is a little known village, in the hills of Colombia, not too far from the coast...called "La Munda." In Spanish, this undefined word would be the feminine version of El Mundo, "The World."
This is most definitely a sacred village, but I dare not disturb it nor beat a path to its door. I know nothing of the people that live there...or what they know of our mother...and that is the way it should be. Perhaps someday, they will tell us of her in their own words...and in their own timing.
For now, I will be content to hear the Chronicles of Amí, and learn of this new found bond between a mother and her son.