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    Posted May 28, 2014 by
    Boulder, Colorado
    This iReport is part of an assignment:
    Your 'Aha' weight-loss moments

    More from fatboyhd1982

    Inside-Out health


    It's funny how the focus in our culture is really about body "image". The whole context of health and weight seems backwards to me. We as a culture really put health in the context of vanity, which is absolutely the least effective way to look at it...it is the reason diets fail (eventually). It's also the reason that the medical community and many health experts give conflicting information on how to attain good health.

    We all have reasons that are deeper than the surface as to why we put into our body the things we do. Some of it can be traced to social forces, culture and tradition, but a big piece can be traced to internal struggle and mindset.

    I did not transform myself from out of a need to secure vanity, the goal at the onset of my journey was to become healthy and fit, not simply to lose weight. During the last two years I have transformed myself from the inside out. I had to deal with my emotional issues and transform my ideals in order to drop 160 lbs from my lumbering 327 lb frame. I was the epitome of a bbq lovin, beef eatin, no veggie buyin, cookin everything with bacon grease chanter of the mantra "Food eats the Salad". I was the person who saw vegan recipes and foods and scoffed at the seemingly foolish reasoning behind such a lifestyle. I wore t-shirts flaunting my morbid obesity, there was one I was particularly fond of (also extremely offensive) that read "I beat Anorexia". I played the part of the fat guy that was quick to cut himself down before others would to get a laugh and soften the shots others would take at my weight. Inside I was bitter and angry that I could not seem to be "normal" like everyone else. On the surface I bought into the whole "Big is Beautiful" campaign to force myself into acceptance of who I was, however I knew that the acceptance I found in such an idea was only skin deep. Today I am a race runnin, from scratch cookin, nutritional and ethical vegan. I have forgiven myself of the sins that created the need for me to punish myself with food in the past. I have rebuked the need to cut myself down in order to normalize my relationships with others.

    Many people understand that they desire good health and a fit physique. I believe, however, that many of those same people desire these things without the need to change their heart and mind to support such a physical transformation. You cannot have the PERMANENT physical change without evolving your ideals around food, health, relationships and yourself.

    It took me 30 years to be ready for this transformation. No one can tell you when it's time, but just know there are exciting things you will learn about yourself beginning the day you begin.
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