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    Posted August 17, 2014 by
    lanizza
    Location
    New Delhi, India

    More from lanizza

    good and bad guys in Delhi

     
    I have reported what happened to me in 2 previous reports titled;
    drugged in |Delhi
    and
    more news from the rape front.
    But felt compelled to also mention these events that were really good.
    Yet the danger remains and lurks everywhere

    ---------------------------------------------
    The stores where guides and taxi’s take you to, to get commission for bringing you there, are in secluded narrow buildings with just too many stairs up or down leading to just too many backrooms.
    They are manned by male vendors that are tourist ripp off professionals.
    They know what we like to hear and get aggressive to dangerous if we buy nothing.
    Most of these vendors are very dangerous to single women.

    The same hotel recommended cab driver took me to another one of these, when I went to hospital for the drug-test that they refused to perform, and was still too drugged to be able to properly protest, or even realise what was happening.
    They sold me pure silk scarves for 900 rupees that were pure viscose, available on any Indian market for 35 rupees.
    In this shop I learned that it is not a good idea to have any vendor take measurements directly on you, better bring something that fits that they can copy, or take measurements of.
    My Hindi is extremely poor but judging from the 3 words I did pick up and the sleazy chuckle of all present in the room, following the comment of the vendor when he measured my hips, he must have said something like; we can all get on this simultaneously.
    They do not think it is rude to speak Hindi all the time amongst each other.

    I did not want the stuff to be brought to the hotel but they just make arrangements for you before you realise what happens
    By now at least some things had dawned upon me about these vendors, so expecting the worst I could think of, I requested the hotelmanager and all the staff to not send anyone up to my room under whatever pretense, but call me down in case there was a delivery or whatever else. They all agreed

    But the ratlike delivery guy , who showed up at 8.30 PM, when it is pitch dark in Delhi, waited till the reception person was away for a few seconds, sneaked up to the elevator and came knocking softly at my door, almost causing me a heart attack, because I had been in alarm phase 1 for 2 days already.

    There was no reply when I called out to find out who was knocking, ( not -delivery- even) so I extra locked the already locked door and bolted it, then called reception
    They had him down in three minutes, so after having calmed down a bit, I went over there , grabbed the stuff without checking it, that later proved to be a mistake, and ran back up again, heart pumping like crazy especially after I had seen him, OMG, imagine that.
    For third parties , again, this was preaented as just another day in the office, showing up after dark, sneaking up to my room, not making himself known at the desk, nor sign the guest book at reception as he is supposed to do, just a normal delivery. Right

    There is no support when you get attacked like this, even fellow tourists will lecture you on over-reactions and a wrong attitude that cause men to act like this ( hello, what is YOUR problem) but I am thankful to myself for the better safe than sorry attitude, that I can recommend to everyone in this country, regardless.
    You simply cannot afford to be naive here.
    Many Indian males regard white women as attractive, no matter how you really look.
    They are ready to seize any opportunity that may arise, so as a white female in India you have to continuously make sure you do not give them ANY chance, or you may well come to regret it, or worse, not even be able to regret it.

    Yet, since I ditched the hotel cab driver I also had some fun or really good experiences in Delhi that feel worth sharing
    Since I travel with ladycabs, I found that the sleazeball driver gave me a distorted image, not of his reality and that of his gangs, as crime is always near and real in Delhi, but of the other side of Delhi, that also exists, as the majority of men in the center are nothing like them.
    They are not gentlemen, but no gangsters either
    They stare but not too much and seem helpful in general in a detached way, even security guards leave their spots to give you directions.

    Example 1;
    I had to wait in line in hospital to pay for my bloodtest, felt really ill, took a long time.
    95% in that line are men, who queue for the females that remain waiting in the few seats available, and feel that pushing against each other will get them to the front of the row faster
    It is not a pleasant experience to get sandwiched between some 30 sweaty strange men, who may also be ill and groping.
    So I waited not inline, but right next to it, in my own line so to speak, next to my virtual spot.
    Then an Indian women wanted to know what country you are from and such and told me to get inline.
    So I gestured, no, it is allright, they know this is my spot.
    Then the guy in front of and the one right behind my virtual spot with a lot of Hindi and gestures assured the woman, yes, it was all Ok, that was my spot.
    Even a man further back, who had proclaimed himself the guardian of the line and warned the cashier when someone tried to jump it, confirmed; yes, he personally guaranteed that was and would remain my spot.
    Until then I never knew for sure if they understood what I was doing but they did and appreciated it as well. Thanks guys. That was a good moment.

    Example 2;
    On Chandni Chowk, that is a very crowded shopping street that is called market in India, not even one guy bothered me, though elderly women did.
    They bump into you deliberately and rudely. Maybe they hate white females or they tried to pick pocket, but for that I was prepared.

    Example 3
    On another occasion the cashpoint ATM malfunctioned as usual, and while I kept trying, a man in muslim dress popped inside ( ATM in Delhi are in a little room with door) so I grabbed my card and bolted.
    He asked; did you finish?
    I said ; no
    Then he waited outside, excused himself for startling me and explained that from the outside he could not see there was someone there, which was true.
    When I left I also excused myself, but he was totally Ok with my behaviour

    Example 4
    the lady cabdriver and me got so into shopping we had to walk back to the car in the dark so I was almost too terrified to move, because in the dark you cannot see any of the men, that are always everywhere in Delhi, sneaking up on you.
    I asked my driver; is this not dangerous?
    But she laughed and shook her head.
    Then I noticed police patrolling and present at the exits near the gates, that I did not spot sooner because you cannot see them in the dark either.
    When we had passed the gates the parking person guy looked out for us so we got back in the cab safely.

    Though I am grateful for and happy with these consoling experiences, that does not mean I would recommend Delhi as a destination for a female alone.
    For us it remains a war zone, because the percentage of rapists is too high and they will stop at nothing.
    Even if you would meet 100 normal men, 5 gang rapists and killers would suffice to do you in in a horrible way and the chance of bumping into such guys is simply way too high.

    There seems to be some urban myth ongoing about white females so we are considered rape kaviar are therefor in high demand so at very high risk, regardless of our looks or age.
    I feel that myth may be what has caused the epedemic proportions of white female rape in India lately
    The police may feel ashamed or reluctant to face this problem, so unless you have really strong evidence, so have really gotten raped good, chances are that they will even turn against you.

    I feel embassies should do more to warn us as you cannot even begin to imagine how bad things are, trust me you cannot.

    The lobsided picture shows birds and a a monument near India gate with lapis covered roof

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