The first time I saw The Grateful Dead was September 21, 1972 at the Philadelphia Spectrum.  It was an absolutely unforgettable experience.  The band played for four and a half hours and it was the most surreal scene of my youth.  The music was beautiful and, as it swirled around us, we began to swirl and dance with it.  As I looked around at the audience, I saw how everyone, including myself, were totally caught up in the good feelings the band’s performance was supplying to us.

As the years went by, I attended many Grateful Dead shows with my friends.  There were so many great parties and fun memories of our travels up and down the east coast to see the shows.  My friends and I grew up in the West End of Chester, Pennsylvania.  And even though we shared many other neighborhood experiences, it was the Dead Shows that forged some of our most lasting memories as friends.  I can remember during the summer parties of 1973, we went through quite a few copies of Europe ‘72!

Francis Lewandowski was a very good friend of mine from Chester.  We just called him Fran and he was, most definitely, a dedicated Deadhead. When the Dead Hour began to be broadcasted on the radio, he made sure he taped every one of them. Unfortunately, Fran was diagnosed with leukemia in 1992 and died in March of 1993.

In the early summer of 1992, Fran was being treated with chemotherapy and was feeling very depressed.  He looked at me and said he wished he could go to just one more Dead Show.  I had always taken photos when we were at the shows. At one show in Norfolk, VA, I took a photo of one of the Dead’s equipment trucks and there was a San Rafael, CA address on the door of the truck.  Without Fran’s knowledge, I sent a letter addressed to the Grateful Dead.  Essentially, I wrote that Fran had a terminal illness and he was hoping to see one more show before he died.  I mentioned that he would need to have a backstage pass so he could have access to an uncrowded bathroom.  Fran had a Hickman catheter implanted on his side.  This is where his chemo drugs were pumped into his body.  He needed to flush his catheter routinely every day.  Because his immune system was so compromised, he would not be able to do this in a crowded public restroom.  I also wrote that Fran was a very close friend and one of the most dedicated Deadheads that I knew.

After I wrote the letter, I thought to myself, “Well, I have done what any friend would have done,” and did not give it any more thought.  Then a couple of weeks later, I was standing in my kitchen and the phone rang around noon time.  I picked up the phone and a voice says, “Hello, is this David?”  The voice then introduced himself as Dennis McNally.  With a significant degree of nervousness, I said it was really nice of him to call.  And he mentioned that he and the band were presently in NYC.  Dennis then said, “Dave, you sure did write one heck of a letter and we were wondering if Fran would be able to go to a show down at RFK in a couple of weeks.”  I told him that he would be able to, but I would have to accompany him.  Dennis then said that was just fine and when we got to the ticket office at RFK, there would be a couple of passes for us.

When I told Fran of the news, he was stunned beyond belief and that is just what I was hoping for.  He did not seem to be that sick anymore.  He had this gigantic smile on his face and he knew that he was going to have a great time.  The day of the show at RFK was a very hot summer day and I was a little concerned about Fran’s stamina.  At this time in my life, I was a student in an RN BSN program and I was aware of the physiological stress that Fran was under.  But he was holding up like a real trooper.

The tickets and passes were at the ticket office just like Dennis said they would be.  When we entered the stadium, it was packed.  We made our way down to the side of the stage and were greeted by the band’s security.  The security personnel were really nice and they made sure Fran had everything he needed.  Within a few minutes of entering the backstage area, Dennis McNally came out to greet us and had a beer with us too!  I had a photo taken of me, Fran and Dennis.  As this was Fran's last Grateful Dead show, I am so thankful that we had a great time together.  Even though it is sometimes hard for me to look at Fran in this photo, I will always remember how happy he was to be at that show.

Fran needed to go backstage to use the bathroom and I waited for him.  Eventually I joined him backstage. But before I did, Vince Welnick came over to talk to me.  He asked me how was Fran's family holding up.  I said as best as they could.  He asked how was I holding up.  I told him I was just taking it one day at a time.  He said I was a good friend for bringing Fran to the show.   I said it was the least I could do.

When I joined Fran backstage, it was easy to relax inside the large space under the stadium. But we were also blown away that we were actually backstage too!  At first, the best part of being backstage at RFK that day, was that we could relax in the comfort of the cool shade while we drank some sodoas.  That was when we looked to our left and in the distance we saw a golf cart approaching.

It was Jerry Garcia riding passenger in an electric cart coming toward us!  So we smiled and waved to Jerry and said hi!  As he continued to get closer, Jerry was smiling and waving at us, until he got real close to us. Then, his looked changed to a puzzled one, as he suddenly realized he had no idea who we were!  And then he kept on going, as it was not too long until show time.  But Fran and I were already doubled over laughing our heads off! It was actually so funny to have Jerry’s smiling face looking right at you and then have it change to shock and disbelief so quickly!

I will always miss Fran as he was one in a million.  But at least we had a great time together at his last Grateful Dead show.  That was in 1992 and it seems like a lifetime ago.  And, without a doubt, I will always remember how wonderful Dennis McNally and The Grateful Dead were to Fran.

A few years later, after I graduated from my BSN program, I moved to the Pacific Northwest.  My girlfriend and I took care of her grandmother and also cared for older adults in our home.   It was a great idea but it became too difficult for us to maintain.  So we decided to move back east.

Before we moved back east, I had one more resident to prepare for discharge.  It was not an easy decision for me.   Scott had sustained an injury back in the mid 70’s while living in his hometown in San Antonio, Texas.  He was only a little older than me and we shared similar tastes in music.  One of the groups we liked was, what else, The Grateful Dead!

So, with the internet now at my fingertips, I went to dead.net, and, behold, there was a show scheduled for the Gorge Amphitheater!   I bought tickets and made reservations at the Best Western in Moses Lake.  I then proceed to tell Scott that we were going to take a trip to see the Columbia River Gorge.

Now Scott did have some physical problems, but his mind was not that slow.  He knew something was up.  I proceeded to load the car up with a bunch of stuff. It was obvious this was not a day trip.   But I decided not to give him the scoop until we were close to show time.

In my haste to get to the show on time, we arrived not one, but two days too early!  But that worked out in our favor.  We got a good night sleep that Friday night.  On Saturday morning we took off to see the Grand Coulee Dam and the gorge.  We took a lot of photos on our trip and had a great time.

Before we left for our trip, Scott’s sister suggested we go to Leavenworth, WA.   It is a replica of a Bavarian village nestled in the eastern foothills of the cascades.  By the way, the prison is in Leavenworth, KS, not in Washington.  When we got to the town, we were impressed with the all the beer gardens serving local micro brewery beer.  I had someone take a photo of us enjoying a brew and sent a copy to Scott’s sister.  She sent it to a family friend who called her back and said that was the happiest they had seen Scott in twenty years!

When we got back from Leavenworth, I told Scott that we should relax for a couple of hours because we had a Dead show to go to.  At first, he got this big smile on his face, and then he laughed and said he knew something was up.  We chilled for a little while and made ready to get over to the Amphitheater.

It was a fantastic show and featured Joan Osborne on vocals and Jimmy Herring on guitar. It had been a long time since I had been to a show and it was like a breath of fresh air.  I almost forgot how much I loved to be there and listening to the jam.  Scott was totally blown away by the show.  We talked a little between breaks.  But we were both blown away by the performance.

The next morning I got up and wanted some coffee.  I told Scott I was going to the lobby to get some food and coffee.  When I entered the lobby I saw the computer kiosk and planned to return.  I returned to the room and asked Scott if it was OK for me to go back and write some emails.  He said he wanted to watch some TV and I returned to the lobby.

While I was sitting at the computer, I saw someone sitting with their back to me reading a book.  A couple wearing tye dye shirts walked up and said, “Phil, that was a great show last night!“  Ah ha!  That must be Phil Lesh!  So, I walked over and introduced myself and said, “Phil that was wonderful show last night,” and he smiled and said thank you.

And then I said, “Phil, I have something to tell you.  It’s been about thirty years since I saw my first Dead show.”  At first, his face fell like an imploded building!  But just as quickly, he beamed a big toothy grin and said, “Well, what a long strange trip it has been indeed!”

That’s when Mickey Hart came into the lobby and began talking about the reviews of the show.  He thought the reviews were good, while Phil thought they were mixed.  I said hello to Mickey and told him how much I liked the show.  He smiled and nodded his head and continued talking to Phil.  Phil slapped his forehead and said, “Mickey, he just paid you a compliment, didn’t you hear him?”  Mickey just smiled and nodded his head.  Phil said, “Dave, you have to forgive him.  It’s the end of the tour and he can’t hear a damn thing!”  So, I thanked him again with a louder voiced and he smiled and nodded his head and gave me a thumbs up!

I then told them about Scott and how I was his caregiver.  I asked them if I could go and get him and bring him to the lobby and they were very agreeable.  So, I rushed back to the room and told Scott very quickly what was going on.  I then pushed his wheelchair as quickly and safely as I could, which resulted in a rather bumpy if not exhilarating ride for Scott!  When we got back to the lobby, Phil and Mickey were waiting for us.

For about a half an hour, they talked to Scott and we had photos of ourselves with them.  Then Phil and Mickey signed a set list and gave it to Scott.  While we were talking to them, we told them that we were from Anderson Island, but originally from elsewhere.  It was nice of them to spend their precious time with us and I know Scott really appreciated it.

I still call Scott from time to time and I know he has the photos in frames in his room.  His sister told me that the concert tye dye I bought him is always draped over a chair in his room.  And he has a CD of the show that I bought on-line right after we got back from the show.  I know that Scott has had a lot of tough times in his life, but at least I was able to get him to smile for a little while.  Sometimes, that’s all that matters.