Nidal was born in the United States of America.

He was a psychiatrist in the United States Army.

Nidal listened to and treated soliders that suffered Post Traumatic Stress.  I am sure  heard  "horror stories".....

Nidal always wanted to marry and have a "wife" but was NOT able to get into or hold onto that type of relationship.

Nidal was born of Palenstine decent therefore one could tell by his "appearance" he was and to further add to it he would wear the clothing that resembled that.....

After the 9/11 terrorist attacks Nidal had received "misplaced anger" from people of the United States...his car was keyed and someone ripped a bumper sticker off of his vehicle.

He was targeted and suffered harrassment and abuse for just being "him"....

According to his cousin and other reports that have surfaced Nidal was opposed to the wars and going to either Iraq or Afganistan....

Nidal had hired an attorney to see about getting out of the Army....

Nidal was told that he was going to be deployed to Afganistan....

Now, here is where my expertise comes in.....I have gone through the same thing with someone in my life.....and this is what "I firmly believe" what happened....

Nidal was a very peaceful and calm individual (on the outside)  in the inside I am sure he was fighting back and tempering his anger and hostility.....how does a person do that?  They don't "talk" much and they become "listeners"  of other people's story....I loved the fact I had an excellent listener in my life HOWEVER they will reveal very little about themselves and what they are thinking...."if" you question or ask something that doesn't feel right or seem right (the person in my life) would BLOW UP with anger, rage, throwing things and physical violence to me...."I hit a nerve and didn't even know what I did"  remember now this IS a very calm and peaceful man....(on the outside)  but an explosive one if you "hit the nerve" of the beast within that they are constantly "taming"  by not talking with others and engaging in conversation with others because "inside"  they are a powder keg ready to go "off"......so they have NO FRIENDS and NO WIFE....because they KNOW the "beast within"  and they KNOW they have a "killer"  inside of them.  This person told me he had "killer" in him.....I never knew what he was talking about until he "almost" did it to me!!

These men are extremely "frustrated" because of their lack of social skills and their inability to keep any relationships and or have a female partner.  I had to work extremely hard to help my person "tame his anger"  and put up with the blow-ups, anger, frustration and physical beatings for years.  I finally had to get court proceedings and intervention to be able to "free myself and get out of the common law marriage"  safe.

With the inability to have female companionships or partners their sexual needs are often met through pornography, strip clubs, or prostitutes.  All of these behaviors are of a sexually defiant nature and leads to self-loathing and self-hatred.

Often times with all the "self-hatred", self-loathing and "insecurities"  they will turn to some type of mood altering medication or alcohol.  I was told that "self-masturbation"  was a form of self-medicating to relieve the anger/frustration of the "beast within"  that had no relief or comfort and nuturing of the love a woman or wife.  They have "no one" to talk to about their problems, anger or frustration....they are "excellent listeners" of others!

When their "needs" are not being met and there is "no one" to talk to about their anxiety's, fears, worries....etc things just build up and up inside as their is no relief and no one to talk to.  A raging war is going inside of this type of person.  They know it, but it is a "secret"  they hold to themselves for "fear" they know they have the capability to harm, hurt and kill inside....

I believe Nidal knew this "secret" inside of himself.  He was angry, very angry for the way he was treated in several areas.  He may have felt he was a target and had these personal attacks and rejection hailed at him.  Remember he is now... he is a nice, peaceful guy and an excellent listener!  What's not to love and trust about this person?  ALOT!  But they hide it, it is a secret!

The mindset and "thinking patterns" of this type of person is basically the same.

They have "no one" to talk to, they have "secrets", they feel rejected, bullied, inadequate, used, can't get there way (he was trying to get out of the Army), and there life is basically going through the motions, non feeling and this deep desire to "get back at or get even" for their miserable life....(this is what I was told)...basically they have a chip on their shoulder, low self esteem, no self-respect and often place themselves in the "loser" category.

Nidal was "angry" he was going to be deployed.  Very angry!  But remember he has no wife, or anyone to talk to about this!  He is a psychiatrist who "listens".....

So, in my opinion, that day he KNEW exactly what he was going to do.  He had a sense of peace and calm about himself because he was "confident" it would work and he would have a successful mission!  He did!  :(   He premeditated his plan and put it into action with his methodical thinking.  He said his "Good-bye's" to neighbors, gave away food from the freezer, gave someone money to clean his apartment, gave away religious material, etc.  He KNEW he was NEVER EVER coming back!  He had his "ducks lined up in a row"  he had a plan and a mission that day!

Nidal went into the convenience store he routinely went in to and ordered his usual coffee and hasbrowns in his native clothing.  He was even caught on tape by the stores surviellance camera!  He even looked happy!  He had a plan, and he was following his OWN agenda on that sad and horrific day at Fort Hood!

He KNEW what he was doing and WHY and was at absolute peace with his plan and decision.  He KNEW he was going to "gun down and shoot innocent people"  he KNEW!

What we have here is a very angry man, VERY ANGRY.  He has not "gotten his way" with much of anything in life,  he felt betrayed by American people as they took their anger out on him because of the 9/11 terrorist attacks, he was angry for his inability to "find a wife" as he put it, and now the American people were sending him to Afganistan to "fight" against his "own" people.  Think about it!  He was born an American but not "treated like one"...and NOW he is supposed to be OK with being an American and fighting as an American but American people have hurt and betrayed him because of his "looks and clothing" and have treated him with misplaced anger and hatred for just being "himself"!  In his mind he is a good guy, never hurt or harmed anyone, and NOW he is supposed to fight for the people who have deeply "wounded and hurt him"....in his mind he basically said, "how dare they, they will not get away with this, I have had enough, and I am going to "stand up for myself!":......these are the very words that were hurled at me when the person I was with had "misplaced anger" towards me!!  I took the fall and brunt of all his past hurts and pain!  :(

So what does Nidal do?  He had his plan ready, was confident, at peace with it and put it in motion....what does he do?  He calmly and peacefully walks into the reception area at Fort Hood and puts his premeditated, methodical plan in action!  He calmly takes out his gun and he is ready with his "misplaced" anger to shoot and kill anyone and everyone in that room.  Nidal opens fire and yells in "arabic"  "GOD IS GREAT"  and starts firing away....killing men, women, one civilian and a woman carrying a precious baby.  He was a killer and he was taking action now and getting "revenge, even, and freeing himself from all that grief, hurt, pain, and anger inside"....this was his way out, to feel the "relief"  as he fired shots and watched peacefully as he gunned down his fellow comrades one by one....the relief, the weight he has been carrying for years is being "lifted off his shoulders" ...this feels good, possibly even great to him....and then one female comrade shoots him in the stomach and his well thought out plan comes to a stop.  His mission ends with the Fort Hood Massacre of 13 dead and 31 wounded.  He carried out and did exactly what he planned to do.

He took innocent, unsuspecting lives with his internal misplaced anger and shot away not giving a damn who was wounded, hurt or killed.  He did NOT care.  He did NOT care.  His personal nightmare was over, he felt happy and it was his greatest relief!  He felt good!

I know this because this is what the person told me when he did this to me!  :(

IF, Nidal was "scared or afraid" to go to Afganistan he would have done what the "normal" person does.  And we have seen, heard and read about it alot lately.  If they are scared, fearful or don't want to do something ....what people "normally" do is committ suicide.  Recent news reports have spoken of people hanging themselves, swallowing pills or turning a gun on themselves.   Did Nidal do that?  NO.  What he did was a self-fulling prophecy for "himself".  A selfish, non caring, unremorseful act of taking his guns and shooting and killing people that "just happen to be there".....how tragic, sad and awful for them!!  So sad!!

In addition, in the hospital he KNEW to ask for an attorney and not answer any questions!  This man KNEW exactly what he was going to do that day, carried out his plan, has now "hired an attorney"  and I am sure he will try and "get out of"   what he did!!

These are my thoughts, I have heard this type of story before and what Nidal did is UNACCEPTABLE!  I feel bad for him that people did mean and cruel things to him, but that in NO WAY gives him the right or reason to take his hurt and anger out on people that did absolutely NOTHING to this man.  They were his friends, his comrades....they were on the same team....and he gunned them down!  How sad and tragic for them.  I will never forget the Fort Hood Massacre and how one individual could hurt, kill and destroy so many human lives.  It is not comprehensible to me at all.  He KNEW what he did and WHY and should be punished for that.  NOW he is that human disgrace he so desperately tried to hide....his "secret"  within....this did NOT need to happen at all.......

My love, condolences and prayers go out to the victims, families, loved ones and all who have suffered at the hands of one individual.  I am so sorry.

Peace and love,

Suzanne Newkirk

Humanitarian