Mother and Daughter unite after 23-year search
It was two days before Christmas, in 2009, when Dianna (Robbins) Williams picked up the phone and heard a voice she never imagined she would hear - saying, "Hi Mommy". It had been 23 long years, and the prayers for her daughter to be with her were soon answered. Dianna’s first child, who she had given up for adoption, had located her through an on-line adoption registry after years of searching.
Earlier this month Dianna and her daughter, Janine Mattarazzo, told their story of heartache, searching, hope, and then a prayer answered. Their story, like many others, is one of courage - and the proof of the power of prayer.
Dianna (Robbins) Williams was living in Berkshire, N.Y. at the age of 18 when she discovered she was pregnant. At that time, according to Dianna, her family was living with alcoholism, and there were many problems that already existed at home.
"When I found out I was pregnant I was too scared to tell anyone," said Dianna. On top of the existing problems at home, Dianna’s father had just lost his job. Dianna admitted that she had been approached about having an abortion, but she did not believe in it, and would not look at it as an option.
Not being able to raise a child at that time, Dianna decided that she would carry her child to full term, and then give it up for adoption.
Being born and raised until the age of 16 in Oklahoma, Dianna’s family had old friends that were interested in adopting, and they soon began the long process through a lawyer in Long Island.
Dianna then headed to Oklahoma, where she was placed in a home for unwed mothers. Because the home was Pentecostal, Dianna spent her time going to church and appointments. "We couldn’t listen to music or do many of the things I could do back home," said Dianna.
On Dec. 3, 1986, Dianna went into labor, and after more than 24 hours in labor, and complications that almost killed her, Dianna gave birth to a nine pound baby girl.
On top of the complications of her pregnancy, Dianna ended up with an $11,000 hospital bill that the adoptive couple was unable to pay. Because of this, the couple backed out of the adoption.
With a release due in two days, Dianna found herself with no where to go, and no money to go anywhere with. It is at that time that she worked with lawyers again and found a single woman working in the medical field that was looking to adopt.
Dianna talked to the prospective adoptive mother for four hours, and made an agreement to give her the child if she would do several things. Dianna wanted to keep the hospital photos, wanted an update of photos throughout her child’s life, and wanted the adoptive mother to give her daughter a letter and necklace that she prepared for her when she got older.
But Dianna also wanted her to do one more thing - if her daughter cried when she handed her over - then she wanted her to give her back.
Dianna described arriving at the lawyer’s office with her baby, who was fussing and crying. And when the adoptive mother walked in the room, Dianna hoped and prayed that the baby would cry - but she didn’t.
They signed the papers and a tearful Dianna flew a long flight back to Syracuse. I dealt with it emotionally by telling myself that I gave this woman a Christmas present," said Dianna. "I gave her a gift."
But the years that followed Dianna were not easy. Dianna described what she refers to as anniversary syndrome. According to Dianna, every year around the date of the adoption she would become irritated, and would cry and get angry. She learned of this syndrome when she finally went to therapy for help.
And following the adoption Dianna had five more children - four boys and one girl, and was married five times. In retrospect, Dianna saw her multiple pregnancies as a search for the girl that she gave up many years ago.
Brandon was Dianna’s first child following the birth of the child she adopted out. She described that when she went to the hospital to have her second child, Gideon, she took a dress with her because she kept hoping for the daughter she surrendered.
And after her third son, Dianna began to think she would never have another daughter. "I felt like God was punishing me," said Diana. But then, when she was getting ready to deliver her fourth son, she let go of feeling punished and was no longer concerned with the gender. "When I found out it was a boy I felt like an anvil was lifted off my chest," said Dianna.
Suddenly Dianna realized that she wasn’t being punished, and her syndrome was lifted. Her fifth child, much to her surprise, was a girl that Dianna named AbBea.
But with five children, and the syndrome lifted, Dianna would continue to have struggles of her own to include dealing with an addiction to drugs and alcohol. Dianna described her struggles, and how each year, on her adopted out daughter’s birthday, her children would celebrate and would countdown the years until they would be able to start searching for her.
But for her daughter, whom we soon learned was named Janine Mattarazzo, her search began much earlier. And Janine, for all those years, was never that far away.
In an interview with Janine earlier this month, she described what it was like growing up in her adoptive home, and how although it was difficult at times - her needs were met.
Janine ended up growing up in Long Island where her adoptive mother remained single, and was a professional working in the healthcare system. According to Janine, her adoptive mother (who we will not name for this story) always told her that she was adopted - but her first remembrance of discussions regarding her adoption were at the age of five.
Janine recalled playing basketball with a friend, and was confronted by someone who said, "Why don’t you have a daddy"? That is when Janine remembers running to her adoptive mother and asking her, "Why don’t I have a daddy"?
Janine further described how her adoptive mother sat her down and said, "Many out there have mommy’s that can’t take care of them. Your mommy couldn’t take care of you, so I took you and picked you out special."
Janine said she understood this a little, but grew to understand it more as she got older. "I had a mother who loved me enough to give me up, and I had a mother who raised me," said Janine.
She described her childhood as good - with good grades and never having run-ins with authorities. But at the age of nine her adoptive grandfather died. "He was like a father to me," said Janine. "I was the apple of his eye."
Then, at the age of 13, Janine’s adoptive grandmother became ill, and passed away shortly after.
When Dianna gave her child away, years before, the adoptive grandmother was with the adoptive mother when she handed Janine over. Dianna had recalled the grandmother saying, "Thank you for the wonderful gift".
Janine, somehow, must have sensed this love - so when her adoptive grandmother passed away, the connection she had with her adoptive mother was soon broken and the harmony disappeared. "The hatred and anger between us started to grow," said Janine.
That is when she began her search. "I didn’t know who I was anymore, and I didn’t know who I looked like," said Janine who was 5’8" tall. Her adoptive mother was 4’11" tall and had different color hair and eyes.
But Janine had one clue. Her adoptive mother told her Dianna’s last known last name was Robbins. Janine immediately went to whitepages.com and searched Oklahoma, but was disappointed when she found 300.
But Janine didn’t give up hope, as the relationship between her and her adoptive mother disintegrated. She continued to search on-line during school. And being a devout Catholic and having great faith, Janine knew that she would some day find her real mother.
Soon, Janine would arrive closer to her mother than she thought - and didn’t even know it. At the age of 18, Janine ran away with a man that was 11 years older than her and moved to Norwich. On New Year’s eve of 2008 she married in a church, but the marriage only lasted two months. She returned back home to Long Island.
And when she arrived back in Long Island, her adoptive mother sat with her for a heart-to-heart talk that they had never had. "She asked me if finding my biological mother really meant that much," said Janine. "I asked her if she never knew where she came from, or who she looked like - wouldn’t it be important?" At that point Janine was given the missing link - her mother’s first name.
With this new information came new hope, and another search in Oklahoma revealed 15 people - one with the name Dianna Robbins. Janine described how she hollered, "Oh my God - This is my mom"! But the phone number listed was disconnected.
But Janine didn’t give up hope. "Honestly," said Janine, "I never expected anything out of searching and people always told me to expect the worst."
But finally, after visiting adoption forums and various sites on the web, Janine discovered "G’s" Adoption Registry. Carefully typing in the state and year of the adoption, and then scrolling down through each year, there it was.
In a loud scream that Janine described as alerting neighbors she said, "I found her"! Janine sent an email through the registry to her mom. And Dianna recalled getting the message from the registry at 10 p.m. that night. The registry asked Dianna, "Are you the Dianna who gave up a baby on December 4, 1986?" Then they told Dianna that her daughter had been looking for her for a long time.
The next day, Dianna called Janine but she wasn’t home. But when Janine arrived home, her adoptive mother told her that her mother called, and Janine almost immediately called her.
"I answered the phone and she said Hi Mommy," said Dianna. Dianna then asked her if she had a good life, and she said yes. Janine asked about her siblings, and was able to later make a call to Dianna’s youngest, AbBea, so they could get acquainted.
On Dec. 24, Janine traveled by bus from Long Island to unite with her mother. Dianna described the reunion as exciting, but scary - stating that she hid until she could see Janine coming off the bus.
Dianna’s ex-husband, who went with her, kept saying, "are you sure it’s your daughter?"
But when her daughter got off the bus and through the door, the two were crying and hugging for a long period of time. And Janine, who was excited to see her mother, called her best friend in Long Island and said, "Oh my God, she looks just like me."
Driving back to Dianna’s home in Newark Valley, Janine has been there ever since. "I don’t want to leave," said Janine. And Dianna doesn’t mind at all. "I always thought she would hate me for giving her up," said Dianna.
Janine and her biological family spent the first night sharing pictures together. When asked if she had any regrets, Janine said that she wished she had found her mother before her biological grandmother died. Dianna’s mother, Lee Brown, passed away from cancer several years ago.
But now, two months later, the happy mom and her daughter are living together like they were never even apart. "I have issues," said Dianna, "so I have to teach her the same things I taught my other kids when they are living in my home."
Janine didn’t mind. "It’s going well," said Janine. "I feel like I was never gone."
During an interview with the two they compared noses, talked of the similarities of their laugh, and talked of all the things that they share in common.
"We finish each other’s sentences," said Janine. "It’s like we’re twins, we have so much in common," Dianna added.
What do you think of this story?
iReport welcomes a lively discussion, so comments on iReports are not pre-screened before they post. See the iReport community guidelines for details about content that is not welcome on iReport.

Comments