Dear Baboon: I have a problem at work with my boss. She's constantly on my back. How would you handle this? Irritated in Indianapolis

Dear Irritated: I bet that makes it hard to get anything done. Try mounting her and ask her how she likes that. Let me now how it ends up.

Dear Baboon: I'm 14 1/2 and I've been dating my boyfriend for about a year now. He's 22. He's really good to me and I want to tell my parents all about him but I'm not sure how they'll react. What do you think? Loved in Louisville

Dear Loved: Math isn't my strongest suit but it seems to me that would have made you 13 1/2 when you two started dating. Therefore, 14 should get him 20, unless dear old Dad gets to him first. I know what I would do to him if you were my daughter. The term boyfriend is far too generous, let's try calling him pedophile.

Dear Baboon: We have an elderly widow lady that lives next door and is as sweet as the day is long. The only problem we have is that she feeds every stray cat in the neighborhood. Her yard and the area adjacent is constantly full of them, dozens at times. We don't want to hurt her feeling but the cats are really making a mess of the yards, and of course their blood curdling fight screams would raise the dead sometimes late at night. What can we do? Vexed in Vegas

Dear Vexed: I suggest you invite me over and we'll have a BBQ. Yummy!

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The Baboon will be in San Francisco this week attending the 43rd annual Advice Columnist Convention and Award Ceremonies. Well, actually I'll just be showing up, signing in, and then partying like it's the end of the world. I'll be back next week with the best of your ridiculous questions and my thought provoking responses.