- Posted June 16, 2012 by
This iReport is part of an assignment:
What makes your Father's Day special?
Of becoming a father and avoiding cheating
Though I feel awkward when my friends on Facebook greet me "Happy Father's Day", the reality has come: I am becoming a father.
This day, I pray to God to love my wife more than ever and serve her to the best of my ability. There are dozens of challenges we are facing in raising up a family - challenges that make our relationship stronger and intimately draw us near to Christ.
Here's a personal story: Throughout my childhood years, my father is always gone as he worked as a seaman and stayed in US till he obtained his permanent visa. Nine years after, I reunited with my dad and spent a year with him in US. Unfortunately, he divorced my mom to petition his mistress to get a working visa in US too. I have already forgiven my dad with what he did, and promised myself that it will not happen to my family. It takes immense dosage of faith for that to happen.
Not that I am generalizing all personnel in the Navy practice the culture of cheating, but most of sailors I know have been fallen to this trap. When we visit other ports, I have witnessed how some grown ups dated foreign women and engaged in one night stands. Others would make womanizing as an activity as if it was a collector's item every port. I can't judge these guys for they have chosen a path they want.
Some friends would tell me: it's alright to have an affair with others as long as I keep it clean and I will not be caught. Though your spouse may not catch you now, he/she can find it out later. Secrets cannot be kept forever. There is always a price to pay. The consequence is unbearable and sometimes will lead to a lifetime suffering.
In societal perspective, divorce - a byproduct of cheating - has increased tremendously. Looking at the military area alone, numbers reveal the truth. Here's what I found out on USA Today: The military divorce rate reached its highest level since 1999, as nearly 30,000 marriages ended in fiscal 2011, raising the prospect that troop withdrawals may lead to more divorce, according to interviews and Pentagon data.
In my personal experience, one of the unfortunate consequence my family faced is that my mom wasn't able to go to United States with us. She was left behind in Manila. Though she felt God's comfort now and happy, it's still sad to see her far from us. My dad realized this lately when he told me to petition my mom since I got my citizenship already.
To avoid what my Dad's past sin, my wife and I commit our relationship to God. If it is for our own will and way, we can't handle the trials and temptations. Minus God, we will struggle in flesh and may have the tendency to follow thousands of Americans who end up in divorce. The secret thing to avoid cheating is a direct submission to God and accepting Christ as personal Lord and savior. The Bible says, "Husbands love your wives, wives submit to your husbands."
When our baby born is boy, my wife and I will share to him God's love first and foremost. Next is we will realize to him how much we love as a couple. Looking forward to a brighter future, when he finds his lifetime partner in the future, he will follow not the world standards but God's standards.
Happy Fathers' Day!