I've had clinical depression for many years and honestly don't remember what life is like without it. What I'd like people to know about depression is the fact that one cannot simply "get over it"; I'm not a weak person because of depression nor am I lazy. I have depression and trying with everything I have to not let it define me. It takes a lot to get out of bed every day and that is if you get out of bed because you haven't slept the night before.Living with depression is watching others live normal healthy lives while you can't think of one good reason to get out of the house; your exhausted before you even get started. The unending cycle of despair, unworthiness and guilt are exhausting; despair because it doesn't change, unworthiness because I just feel like I've failed - failed to live life to it's fullest and then there is guilt. Guilt is the most gut wrenching as I am my own worst critic. Depression feels like grief that unshakable pain that only time heals but never does. My doctor manages my medication, my husband gives me his shoulder and depression forums allow me to vent and to know that I'm not alone. It's sad that depression comes with a stigma because to live alone with it is as bad as it gets. There is no shame in getting help, it doesn't mean that you are weak. It takes a strong person to know when they need help.
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