About this iReport
  • Not verified by CNN

  • Click to view melissahlove's profile
    Posted November 15, 2012 by
    Lilburn, Georgia
    This iReport is part of an assignment:
    CNN Fit Nation: 2013 Triathlon Challenge

    Getting Back to Me

    My name is Melissa Love-Ghaffari. By training, I am a health educator. I have the skills to help people quit smoking, to identify behaviors that lead to unhealthy lifestyles, to look at a menu and pick out the healthful items, but you wouldn't know it to look at me. After 12 long, physically stagnant years on the road of study and work in a field that required me to "do as I say", I found myself at the end of it much more in need of my own services than at the start of my academic journey. There is no way I would be able to go into the field and do what I have been trained to do. My only options are desk jobs which only perpetuates the problems I face with my health.

    In 2004 I married the love of my life after 9 years of dating. We then took a crash course in having babies (we had 3 kids in less than 4 years, all single births). After our third child, I decided to stay home rather than work and this is when I really started to feel lost. My relationship with my husband had naturally changed with kids in the house, I had 3 new, extremely dependent people in my life, and my career path had veered way off the tracks. I struggled with my decision to stay home and after a period of mourning, I came to terms with it and began to enjoy aspects of it. However, this feeling of loss hasn't been completely resolved. I also know that only I can fill this perceived hole in my life.

    I know and understand that there is no quick fix, that I have a long, arduous journey ahead of me, but I feel as if I'm running out of time. Time, I can never seem to find enough time, yet it slips away so quickly. Something has to change and it needs to happen now. I need and want this opportunity to find my strength and confidence again, to be the wife my husband married and the mother my children deserve, but mostly to walk with pride that only great accomplishment can give.

    I am ready for this. I am itching for it. I look forward to having this opportunity!
    Add your Story Add your Story