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  • Approved for CNN

  • Click to view krysbliss's profile
    Posted December 7, 2012 by
    los angeles, California
    This iReport is part of an assignment:
    Faith-shaking moments

    Half Lesbian


    CNN PRODUCER NOTE     krysbliss says being gay as a Korean American can be challenging at times because of cultural issues. She says that many Koreans view being gay as a sickness, and although she has mentioned her sexuality to her parents, she feels as though they do not fully understand. 'He is always telling me he wants me to be happy but wishes I would get married to a man,' she said. She says because of her current job she now hides the face that she is gay, as opposed to when she was in high school and openly talked about it. 'Funny, I used to talk to my friends about my crush on Angelina Jolie, today I am the opposite -- for social purposes -- I have a straight Facebook and I talk about how good-looking some actor is. Being gay now, I am secretive about my sexuality,' she said. She says as more states recognize same-sex marriage, she is hopefully it will eventually be recognized at the federal level.
    - Jareen, CNN iReport producer

    Well, I have always shared my interest for the same sex since middle school. I was born and raised here and it was easy for me to talk about it. I went to school in the 2000's since I'm 25. Middle School and High school were completed in California.


    Up until college even, nobody takes your opnion and statement seriously, especially if you're a Asian female.
    My mother has scolded me whenever I brought it up, even till this day she tells me I will eventually marry a man.


    I understand.


    I've always been happy, open about my sexuality and it's very ironic? depressing? that I have actually stepped in the closet. It happened in recent years, I started working with Korean colleagues. Working at a Korean company wouldn't have changed my sharing habits but meeting someone I really cared about has. Since all my friends were in the closet, I didn't want to lose them or put them in a difficult situation. These new friends of mine are very afraid of how the Korean community will treat them- even living in America. Over the years, as my father started becoming religious- he has also put some pressure on me because Korean churches ( most of them) strongly oppose any gay related issue. I used to be a preschool volunteer and had to quit because I was really saddened by my pastors prayer with the parents. It started out with "God, please protect our children, there are many obstacles for them to face- etc etc- they are now teaching gay history in schools, help us protect our children from such problems"
    Whatever happens, I think the idea of accepting difference is important. I don't want an individual to be forced to like something but I do want people to keep their hands to themselves. I hate plenty of things, but I was taught not to hurt others. I am understanding, I can't change my opinion too easily but I will not be mean about it.




    Back to the subject, Then and Now.
    Now, I am more confident legally, I am still cautious (of hate crimes and gay bashing) but I am safe when it comes to work in the states. Even if its difficult and complex if someone fires/harasses you for being gay.. you can still get help for it.


    Living in the closet, I still sign petitions and observe what is going on everyday.
    I still get very defensive if someone saids something bad about gay people.


    The media these days- HUGE impact on the same sex issue. I am very proud the media is supportive. It's a little bit funny now because every show on the network has a gay character- not that its bad but it looks like they are doing it for popularity. I just wish they wouldn't go so far with the stereotypes. A bit worried the trend will die before we get to repeal DOMA. and some parts of town, are extra nice to lgbt because it is their marketing tool.
    Okay, this sounds ignorant of me. When I hang out at gay clubs or bars, I get annoyed that a lot of straight people take over. I get annoyed because some just sit there and laugh at the gay couples or act like they are celebrities for grabbing a table at a gay club.


    Myself, being a lesbian- I registered to vote after prop 8 passed by 51%. The older I get, I am becoming more anxious. I would like healthcare, benefits, equality for all and future generations. Regarding this, when I hear people saying the US is doomed or we are going against Gods will- it scares me. it scares me that I live with these people in proximity. Maybe this is the same way they feel about me. Hopefully, we overcome everything. marriage and sex between adults shouldn't be such a big problem. I know politically things are more complex- but this is how I always viewed it- there shouldn't be a problem .


    I am happy lgbt has a brighter future.

    Please excuse my grammar. Thank  you.

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