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The fiscal cliff: Messages to Washington
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- Posted January 7, 2013 by
- FiscalCleft Follow
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Swollen Federal Deficit Demands Medication
WASHINGTON – Breaking its months-long silence, the swollen, bruised Federal Deficit is demanding medication for its current condition.
Speaking to reporters in a cramped semi-private hospital room in D.C., the Federal Deficit, also known as F.D., complained loudly about its treatment in the debates around the fiscal cliff issue, laying underneath a stained bed sheet.
“How you reporters forget.” J.D. sniffed. “Congress began this argument to decrease my swollen figure.”
In a dramatic moment, J.D. threw the cover off and exposed his battered, bruised body.
“Is this swollen enough for you, Congress?” J.D. yelled in frustration.
No matter what targets were given by either Democrats or Republicans, the goal was to whittle down the total Federal Debt of 16 trillion dollars. However, it appears the goal has been taken over by talks of the fiscal cliff, blurring the specific goals congress had in mind.
“I’ve known Cliff for years.” J.D. said, referring to the fiscal cliff by his informal name. “He’s always taking up the spotlight, when it’s me you should be concentrating on.” F.D. cried, laying flat on his back, an I.V. attached to his swollen arm. “I’m the one you should be caring for!”.
As of press time, no official comment has been made from either the White House or the Republicans, but a wilted bouquet of roses from Speaker Boehner lay by J.D.’s bedside.
Speaking to reporters in a cramped semi-private hospital room in D.C., the Federal Deficit, also known as F.D., complained loudly about its treatment in the debates around the fiscal cliff issue, laying underneath a stained bed sheet.
“How you reporters forget.” J.D. sniffed. “Congress began this argument to decrease my swollen figure.”
In a dramatic moment, J.D. threw the cover off and exposed his battered, bruised body.
“Is this swollen enough for you, Congress?” J.D. yelled in frustration.
No matter what targets were given by either Democrats or Republicans, the goal was to whittle down the total Federal Debt of 16 trillion dollars. However, it appears the goal has been taken over by talks of the fiscal cliff, blurring the specific goals congress had in mind.
“I’ve known Cliff for years.” J.D. said, referring to the fiscal cliff by his informal name. “He’s always taking up the spotlight, when it’s me you should be concentrating on.” F.D. cried, laying flat on his back, an I.V. attached to his swollen arm. “I’m the one you should be caring for!”.
As of press time, no official comment has been made from either the White House or the Republicans, but a wilted bouquet of roses from Speaker Boehner lay by J.D.’s bedside.
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