- Posted January 18, 2013 by
West Seattle, Washington
This iReport is part of an assignment:
Lance Armstrong speaks out
My Letter to Lance
I really did believe you. I defended you. I even was inspired by you. And, like you, I was wrong.
There was no way that you did it. There was my persistent and heartfelt belief that you endured something so much worse than any sport or physical event that you could overcome whatever pain came your way. I remember climbing mountains thinking that if you could come back from cancer and win a Tour that I too could endure what pain and discomfort was in front of me. I used that strength many times, for me and to help others. In fact, one quote of yours sticks with me:
“Suffering, I was beginning to think, was essential to a good life, and as inextricable from such a life as bliss. It's a great enhancer. It might last a minute, or a month, but eventually it subsides, and when it does, something else takes its place, and maybe that thing is a greater space. For happiness. Each time I encountered suffering, I believe that I grew, and further defined my capacities--not just my physical ones, but my interior ones as well, for contentment, friendship, or any other human experience.”
Now I know it was all a lie. You cheated. You didn’t suffer, you found a way around that to make it easier on yourself to “win”.
But what troubles me the most,
- I used you to inspire me
- I used you to inspire others
- I told others they were wrong when they said you were a fraud
- I continued to believe in you and what you “stood” for
- I told my kids about you and your unwavering strength
See, Lance, your lies made me a liar. You made me a lesser person because I supported you and everything you said and did. I should have listened to everyone else, including heroes of mine that you vilified (Sorry, Greg).
It’s not my place to judge you or the decisions you’ve made. Hell, it’s not my place to even care. Unfortunately, I do. And I’ll leave you with this:
Don’t go away mad, Lance. Just go away.