- Posted February 8, 2013 by
This iReport is part of an assignment:
Have you had an abortion?
NEVER HAD A CHILD AGAIN!
I was in high school and in love (or thought I was). I found out I was pregnant and my boyfriend left the decision up to me. We never told our parents or friends. I went to the abortion facility and they never performed a pregnancy test or explained the procedure to me. I remember most vividly the sucking sound of the machine and the jar on the floor. I never knew the doctor or nurse and never saw them again. They gave us juice and cookies after my abortion. I was given antibiotics for 2 weeks afterward in case there was an infection (from what you would ask? the instruments? Body parts left inside me? what???) There was no counseling, no one to hold my hand, no one to tell me about an adoption plan. My boyfriend was not there. It was a cold, unfeeling place devoid of any human concern for me. I went to my homecoming dance that night (a fall formal) as if nothing had happened. That's when the denial began - immediately! I did not face my abortion for more than 10 years later. I buried it and decided I never had to deal with it again.
I was scared to death and ashamed. Besides, I was a straight A student and athlete and this baby would ruin my college career and what would people say. I would be the first person in my family to go to college. Well, the reality is my abortion RUINED MY LIFE!
Afterwards, I was in denial, depressed, suicidal, sad, emotional; basically never the same. I experienced failed relationships afterward. I did not jump from relationship to relationship - they were long-term but the damage was done and I felt damaged.
When I married in my 40's, I experienced endometriosis and infertility at a time when I wanted children and by then it was too late. I was never able to have children again - EVER! They did not tell me that! My abortion affected not only me but my husband too. So much for his choice! Abortion did not help me - it hurt me!
Yet, God is good and he blessed us with 2 adopted little boys - one was adopted on Mother's Day and changed Mother's Day for me forever with love and hope.
I was young and found abortion was not a choice or the answer. It hurt me, my husband, and my family.
Now I share my story. I was not given any of the facts about abortion that should have been given to me - like breast cancer, cervical cancer (I know many who have had both because of their abortion), infertility, endometriosis, etc. The procedure was not explained to me. So much for choice! I was not told about the baby's development, no ultrasound was performed, I was not asked to come back for a follow-up. I was never told that pregnancy would be my last or that infertility would result.
Women deserve and need to know the truth about abortion! I hope my story saves another young woman from having an abortion and experiencing the pain I have over the years. Abortion is not the answer!
Adoption is the least talked about choice and the best choice for everyone!