- Posted February 8, 2013 by
This iReport is part of an assignment:
Have you had an abortion?
I was 12 and a half years old, and had no idea what was happening.
I blocked out of my mind all the sexual abuse that I had endured as a child, and would continue to block it out for years to come. The family doctor handled everything. Bladder infections, urine tests, pregnancy tests, everything.
I went in for what I thought was a visit to the doctor about a bladder infection, but I kept insisting that I did not have a bladder infection. I was sent into a room I had never been in before, and I saw a table with metal bars and foot rests they called stirrups, and I was stripped from the waist down by the nurse and strapped onto the table. My arms and legs were in restraints. I was crying. I got a shot in my stomach and then I started crying and screaming, There was a thump, thump from a machine they called a vacuum, and there was a plastic tube, and pain between my legs and inside me, and then I blacked out, I was so terrified.
When it was done, the nurse helped me dress, and I was sobbing because she was putting a huge hospital kotex in my underwear, and she was telling me I had to wear these for a few days. I thought it meant that from now on, all my periods would be like this. I bled so heavy, I was anemic and had to stay home from school. The pain lingered for a couple of months.
I suffered about 6 more abortions until I was 17, a couple of them second trimester, at which point they put an IUD in me. I was blocking out all the abuse, so no one could get me to take a birth control pill everyday. I had nightmares for years about babies being missing, or brutally murdered.
Years later, when I was married and having babies, I suffered post-partum depression and then flashbacks to all the abuse and the abortions. It was all violence to me. All of it. Abortion never protected me, and no pro-choice feminists in the abortion industry ever tried to rescue me.
Today I am a pro-life sidewalk counselor in front of abortion clinics, and I still see frightened young girls being brought there for abortions. I wish someone had been there to rescue me.
I was once told by a pro-choice woman that my mother should have aborted me to spare me a life of abuse. I have heard other people justify abortion in this way--that some children are better off never being born.
My babies were children with rights, just like I was. They were being murdered, and so was I. I could have died from the abortions, and been with my babies in heaven, away from the abuse. But instead, I am alive to speak for all the unborn being murdered, and all the women and children of abuse. We have the right to life, and to be protected from abuse by the law.