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I will do it over again.
I am 23 years old, and I had an abortion when I was 17. I will not go into the circumstances as they are irrelevant. I was scared, just as any young woman would be. I heard the propaganda, the "you will regret it", the "you will die", the "you're killing your baby" and other shit. I had my abortion set for a week after my initial appointment, where I went over with the nurse that the abortion was what I wanted, that I didn't want to look at adoption pamphlets(yes, they asked me if I considered adopting out), and set up my appointment, and for that week in between, I researched and researched like my time was running out.
I have always been pro-choice, and I was open to reading both sides. I got a human development book from the library, and read the entire 400+ pages of it. I read studies on regret, death, etc. Everything pointed to abortion being absolutely safe, so I took a sigh of relief. When the day of my abortion arrived, mid-February of 2007, I went in, I registered, and I waited for my name to be called. I was told not to eat or drink anything from the night prior. When my name was called, I was lead into an office, where a counselor sat down with me for about 45 minutes, to make sure I was actually seeking an abortion on my own accord and not forced into it. She asked me at least 15 times if I was absolutely sure. I was.
After the session, I was lead into another room, where I was asked to lay down so they could perform an ultrasound to confirm how far along I was, I asked my mom to come to the room with me. The nurse asked if I wanted to see the fetus, and both my mom and I said yes. The nurse turned the monitor towards us, and whatever was on the screen looked like a fat jelly bean. I looked over at my mom and she was making a weird face, attempting to make out parts(we are both artists and have no problems seeing an ultrasound and pointing out exactly what is what). She couldn't. At that point, I was 9 weeks along. The exam was done, but not before the nurse asked me another 3 times if I was absolutely sure. I repeated that I was.
I was then lead to another room, and was asked to strip from the waist down, and lay down on the table and put my legs in stirrups. My mom had to go back out to the waiting area. Another nurse and the doctor walked and introduced themselves. Both the nurse and the doctor were really nice, calming and sweet. The nurse sat down and said that if anything hurts, I can tell her and she asked if I wanted to hold her hand. I reached up my hand to her. The doctor then sat down, and went over a few more things, mostly about post-op bleeding, cramping, slight fever and pain. She then asked me again if I was absolutely sure. I said yes. She proceeded, and then she injected a local into my cervix. She peeked up between my legs, and said, "this is the last chance- are you absolutely sure you want me to proceed", I nodded. All I remember is slight cramping for about 3 minutes. The doctor said it was from the cervix having to stay open. I then heard very light humming, and saw red coming through one of the tubes into a jar on ta little rolling table to the side of the doctor. I asked the nurse if that was what was in my uterus, she nodded and squeezed my hand. The entire procedure took about 5 minutes. There wasn't much in the jar afterwards, maybe about a quarter of a cup, if that. After the doctor finished, she gave me a hug, said she'll see me in 2 weeks, and excused herself. The nurse handed me my clothes as I was sitting up, and sat back down to talk to me. I asked her if everything was over and she said yes. I then asked her if I should feel cramps, and she said yes, that for a few days, I would feel cramping, bleeding and it would feel like a heavy period. I then told her that I felt relived and much better, and she stated that most of their patients do.
After I was dressed, the nurse lead me out to a resting area. It was dark and cool. I was given a bottle of orange juice, and some Oreos. I sat in the dark for about 45 minutes. I was finally ready to leave and see my mom. When I came out to the waiting room, my mom stood up, came over and hugged me, and we left to go home.
I have to say, that since that experience, I have not felt a smudge of regret, guilt, shame or sadness. I got all the proper counseling from Planned Parenthood, they went out of the way to provide me with information and compassion. They went out of their way to make sure that the abortion was exactly what I wanted, and made sure to check up on me afterwards. I still feel the same way as I did on the day of my abortion.
As far as now, I have no regrets over my abortion, I'm still the same as ever. Actually, I'm more pro-choice than I was when I had my abortion. I understand that women need this service and I will fight till the day I die for every woman's right to choose their paths.
I wouldn't change a thing about the abortion. I am happy with my choice, I am glad I had control over my body, and will fight tooth and nail to keep it that way for everyone.
I have always been pro-choice, and I was open to reading both sides. I got a human development book from the library, and read the entire 400+ pages of it. I read studies on regret, death, etc. Everything pointed to abortion being absolutely safe, so I took a sigh of relief. When the day of my abortion arrived, mid-February of 2007, I went in, I registered, and I waited for my name to be called. I was told not to eat or drink anything from the night prior. When my name was called, I was lead into an office, where a counselor sat down with me for about 45 minutes, to make sure I was actually seeking an abortion on my own accord and not forced into it. She asked me at least 15 times if I was absolutely sure. I was.
After the session, I was lead into another room, where I was asked to lay down so they could perform an ultrasound to confirm how far along I was, I asked my mom to come to the room with me. The nurse asked if I wanted to see the fetus, and both my mom and I said yes. The nurse turned the monitor towards us, and whatever was on the screen looked like a fat jelly bean. I looked over at my mom and she was making a weird face, attempting to make out parts(we are both artists and have no problems seeing an ultrasound and pointing out exactly what is what). She couldn't. At that point, I was 9 weeks along. The exam was done, but not before the nurse asked me another 3 times if I was absolutely sure. I repeated that I was.
I was then lead to another room, and was asked to strip from the waist down, and lay down on the table and put my legs in stirrups. My mom had to go back out to the waiting area. Another nurse and the doctor walked and introduced themselves. Both the nurse and the doctor were really nice, calming and sweet. The nurse sat down and said that if anything hurts, I can tell her and she asked if I wanted to hold her hand. I reached up my hand to her. The doctor then sat down, and went over a few more things, mostly about post-op bleeding, cramping, slight fever and pain. She then asked me again if I was absolutely sure. I said yes. She proceeded, and then she injected a local into my cervix. She peeked up between my legs, and said, "this is the last chance- are you absolutely sure you want me to proceed", I nodded. All I remember is slight cramping for about 3 minutes. The doctor said it was from the cervix having to stay open. I then heard very light humming, and saw red coming through one of the tubes into a jar on ta little rolling table to the side of the doctor. I asked the nurse if that was what was in my uterus, she nodded and squeezed my hand. The entire procedure took about 5 minutes. There wasn't much in the jar afterwards, maybe about a quarter of a cup, if that. After the doctor finished, she gave me a hug, said she'll see me in 2 weeks, and excused herself. The nurse handed me my clothes as I was sitting up, and sat back down to talk to me. I asked her if everything was over and she said yes. I then asked her if I should feel cramps, and she said yes, that for a few days, I would feel cramping, bleeding and it would feel like a heavy period. I then told her that I felt relived and much better, and she stated that most of their patients do.
After I was dressed, the nurse lead me out to a resting area. It was dark and cool. I was given a bottle of orange juice, and some Oreos. I sat in the dark for about 45 minutes. I was finally ready to leave and see my mom. When I came out to the waiting room, my mom stood up, came over and hugged me, and we left to go home.
I have to say, that since that experience, I have not felt a smudge of regret, guilt, shame or sadness. I got all the proper counseling from Planned Parenthood, they went out of the way to provide me with information and compassion. They went out of their way to make sure that the abortion was exactly what I wanted, and made sure to check up on me afterwards. I still feel the same way as I did on the day of my abortion.
As far as now, I have no regrets over my abortion, I'm still the same as ever. Actually, I'm more pro-choice than I was when I had my abortion. I understand that women need this service and I will fight till the day I die for every woman's right to choose their paths.
I wouldn't change a thing about the abortion. I am happy with my choice, I am glad I had control over my body, and will fight tooth and nail to keep it that way for everyone.
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