- Posted February 14, 2013 by
This iReport is part of an assignment:
Have you had an abortion?
Deceived by Health Care Professionals
I did not escape the proverbial spiral that accompanies every “Choice” to kill one’s child. Self-destructive behaviour ensued because I had found no reason to care about myself anymore.
Directly by the hands of that physician and those nurses, my babies died a horrific and brutal slaughter and in some manner which is beyond my comprehension, I died as well.
About a decade went by and if I wouldn’t have had my beautiful living daughter to raise, I would have killed myself. She was my only purpose in living. I felt powerless over evil and I felt as though it consumed me. I reached for the Scriptures, and all alone, in my isolated pit, I read the bible, a little every day.
I believed that I had committed the ‘unforgivable sin’, and that I was destined for hell. One day I got on my knees and asked God to tell my babies that I was sorry.
I’ll never forget that moment when I heard God speak to me. In my inner ear I heard him say this: “They’re praying for you now.” I cried a river.
This was the pivotal moment of my entire life! From this I realized true love. I had not known a love like this ever before. I knew this unconditional love of my children was from God, and I just knew that if they could forgive me, then He forgave me! I knew it came through them from Him.
I turned my life around. I began to love Him because He first loved me. He gave me power over the evil through grace and public confession, the Word of God, obedience, prayer, a ton of fasting, and perseverance. If I had known about the power given to our Priests in the confessional it would have been a lot easier and I and my daughter would have had much less to sacrifice. Alas, I trust it will all work out for our good.
Eventually I trained as a Nurse. Wouldn’t you know I was assigned to the O.R. on abortion day. I observed in pre-op the many women who would suffer that day. Some came in with men who seemed cold and forceful. Some women looked depressed and empty. In the O.R. I was in conflict. Today I regret that I didn’t speak out and tell them what I knew. I stood next to my abortionist and said nothing. At the time I was focussed on forgiving him as I had been holding a lot of anger. I knew if I said anything I would lose my opportunity to become a Nurse. Ironically, the nursing profession is known as one that ‘eats their young’. Today, I wish I would have spoken up and suffered the consequences. I observed one procedure which fulfilled the expectations of my instructors, and then I exited the room and went into the Recovery Room. There I witnessed the women waking up crying. We didn’t share any words, I just prayed for them.
After a decade of hospital nursing and coming to terms with the fact that the system is poisoned by this human sacrifice of abortion, I could no longer remain therein. My refusal to cooperate anymore did cost a lot, and it took another decade to pick up the pieces.
I have a strong desire to empower our health care professionals so they can bring honour back to the medical professions by speaking out and refusing to do the evil. Today, I am nursing our community back to health by activities specific to pro-life ministry and I am grateful for the privilege. God willing, I will be able to continue and step by step, one heart at a time, be a part of a life giving movement to transform a culture.