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    Posted April 1, 2013 by
    Moderate1981
    Assignment
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    This iReport is part of an assignment:
    First Person: Your essays

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    Anxiety Disorders

     

    I have an anxiety disorder. I was diagnosed in late 1999. Although this may seem small or not a fault it does present difficulties that result in sometimes unusual behavior from my 'normal' state. Panic attacks, anxiety attack, and racing (a term I use for when it feels like your heart is pounding yet different from a panic attack). I am not ashamed of this or embarrassed! No one else should either.

     

    What I am embarrassed by is the cynicism and the off kilter displaced presence I am aware of when my anxiety is high. To all those I sometimes offend I apologize. What I don't apologize for is having the disorder. I actually find it a plus in some ways.

     

    Sometimes I have found my anxiety disorder to come to my advantage. When having an anxiety disorder, in my experience, can drive motivation through the roof. It also can help with projects that require late nights as I am on a benzodiazepines to get to sleep. I can not get to sleep without them. It helps force me to stay fit because for a release exercise. Lastly it helps remind me and be cognisant of other behavior and their perceptions.

     

    I am not afraid. I come from a biological background which holster genetic (in many peoples opinion) disposition. This is not to say that I don't have some control over this. Anxiety disorders from personal experience are something that the general population commonly disregard as a 'hokey pokey' copout. I am telling you it is NOT!

     

    To everyone with a disability out there I say don't be ashamed. Remember that it can be used to your advantage (in many cases). Don't be afraid.

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